Fake letters and dating service fraud

[Delphi_Programmer]

I got an email from a friend today.

He lives in Eastern Europe and says he knows the ins and outs of dating agencies in the Ukraine and Russia.

He says that, from his experience, many agencies over there that feed into the large U.S. based dating services publish about 50% fake profiles. They fill out the fields with shots of beautiful young women who are a "10" in looks - and then bait and switch you with someone more "realistic" after things don't work out.  He says he has a friend who tells him all the time that U.S. customers are "losers and suckers".  They love telling men that IMBRA prevents them from knowing if the women really exist or not.  But, of course, they don't actually get signatures before they write fake letters on behalf of fake women.  When actual contact information from the women was disseminated to the men, this type of fraud was harder to pull off and less common.

I don't have experience with this, since my focus has always been the Philippines and not Russia/Eastern Europe.  However, I'm not so naive to think that this type of scam practice doesn't go on, probably in both places.

The message from this is that IMBRA-type laws do nothing to ensure that men receive honest, accurate information and that the introductions they receive are in good faith.  Nor do these laws do much to protect women, and do absolutely nothing to protect American women since there are no disclosure requirements for domestic introductions.

If women's groups were really about protecting women, then why don't they pass laws that are broader in scope but less intrusive toward certain people, and that protect all women and not just a selected few?  Why is there no interest in protecting men as well as women?  Why do their laws use libelous language like "marriage broker", "female recruit" and "male client", but leave gaping holes in the larger practice of Internet dating?  Meeting strangers online is a dangerous practice, whether the stranger you meet lives halfway around the world or down the block from you.  Despite this fact, adults are presumed to be responsible for their own safety and protection.  Why is it different when people cross international borders?

I got another bit of distressing news today.  I heard that wait times for K-3 marriage visas fro the Philippines are up to 3 to FIVE YEARS!  This is a disgrace!  For K-1 fiance visas, waits are 8 to 12 months.  This means that if you exhaust your 2-visa limit and wish to marry someone from the Philippines, you may have to wait a HALF A DECADE from your wedding day to be with your spouse.  These laws need to be challenged and repealed.

[batmanrr]

I am an experienced dater of Ukrainian women. I have found that I only meet 50% or so of the women I have corresponded with!

In many cases photos of women who have had profiles are hijacked by the translators of the local agencies and used for generating revenue from letter exchanges. Other women let these agencies use the photos as a favor and to earn money themselves. There are many women participating in these scams in order to make some money! If you send one of these ladies some overpriced flowers, you get pictures of the woman with some rented flowers from a flower shop. Everybody splits the money!

I have also had many interesting and fun dates with the 50% I have met. Even the substitutes I met have been very nice. When you get there you do have many opportunities to meet women through agencies, and at clubs. In the past three years of going to Ukraine I have dated dozens of women.  Many 8s and 9s and quite a few 10s!

When I made my first trip to Ukraine on an organized tour I quickly got a reputation among the 45 men on the tour as the guy getting the most dates! This is because I overbooked and decided to try to meet 9 women on a 9 day tour. I did meet 5 of the 9 plus two more from the two socials I attended. I ended up having multiple dates with some of the 7 women I met that trip. I did return to spend a lot of time with one of those ladies I met at the social.

At this time, I have a relationship with a beautiful young lady in Ukraine. If you saw her photos you would say “she’s a 10”! Her borrowed profile hit a high of $17 per letter on one of the US sites that has variable pricing to open a lady’s letter. She has many girl friends that spend time with us. Many times I find myself surrounded by 5 or more gorgeous ladies.

The bottom line is that I always return home from Ukraine happier than when I arrived!

[tristan]

A contributor to this site relocated permanently to Vietnam.  He calls the US "Sexual Siberia."

[bugman7]

I heard that wait times for K-3 marriage visas fro the Philippines are up to 3 to FIVE YEARS!  This is a disgrace!  For K-1 fiance visas, waits are 8 to 12 months.  This means that if you exhaust your 2-visa limit and wish to marry someone from the Philippines, you may have to wait a HALF A DECADE from your wedding day

The taxpayer funded special interests groups such as the Tahirih Justice Center and the Polaris Project have influenced legislators to enact laws that make it easier for illegal immigrants to enter the country. Meanwhile those same special groups have been allowed to lobby public government employees and officials within the USCIS in order to make it more difficult for Americans citizens to legally sponsor their immigrant spouses on a fiancee visa.

I just spoke with a 45 year old Russian lady last night who met her first American husband through a dating agency back in 1994. It took her 14 days to get her Visa approved. Imagine that.

It might be easier for a Phillippine citizen to get a tourist visa and arrive illegally rather than applying for a spousal visa.

[Delphi_Programmer]

It is practically impossible for most people from certain countries (which includes the Philippines, as well as countries like Vietnam, Thailand, Malaysia and others) to come to the U.S. on a tourist visa.  They have to have enough money/assets in their name to want to return to their country.  Failing that, the only way to come to the U.S. is either a work visa (which can take up to 10 years), a family visa (10 to 20 years) or a marriage visa (which was 8 months to a year in 1993 when I married my wife -- now up to FIVE years!).

Michael Garfinkle is an immigration attorney who works with Filipinos, and hosts a show called Citizen Pinoy.  A middle-aged American man with a friendly disposition and himself married to a Filipina, he comes across as very promising to people.  However, his favorite word is "unfortunately", and he seems to have more bad news than good to tell most people.  His rates are also through the roof.  His marriage is very "appropriate", so I wouldn't trust him to go out of his way for someone whose spouse is either very young or much younger than himself.

The way I see it, if you can legally marry someone then you have a right to be with that person.  No government should have the right to separate two people who are legally married.  Foreigners DO NOT have an unfettered right to come to this country indiscriminately of their own initiative, but as an American citizen, I should have a right to be with any person of my choosing through a legal arrangement like marriage or employment, whether or not that person is from this country.  As a home owner, I have a right to allow anyone of my choosing to enter my home.  As a citizen and part owner of this country (I pay my taxes!), I should have a say in who can enter my country and live under my roof at my expense.  Again, as long as all civil laws are obeyed.  Telling people who are ALREADY MARRIED that they have to wait five years is unacceptable and morally wrong.

We have it backwards.  We allow Mexican and other people to "jump the fence", come here illegally, get instant residence and all kinds of benefits.  But people who play by the rules and go through the process have to be denied the best years of their lives together.  A total disgrace!

[batmanrr]

From a post to one of our media friends,


I've spent extended amounts of time in Eastern Europe and dated several
women there, mostly through contacts made with a Ukrainian-American business
associate.

What do they see in American men? An easy visa out of the Ukraine

and a meal ticket to a better life, usually with a divorce in
mind once the green card is permanent.

 

On a plane ride from Kiev to Frankfurt, I sat next to an Army Inspector who'd just finished

10 weeks at the US Embassy there. We talked about how naturally beautiful and good-natured

the Ukrainian women were. Except he noted that the ones who had been lucky enough to get jobs at
the embassy were called VGM's by the American men. As in "visa-guided missiles".

I agree with your take on these laws and their lack of constitutionality,
not to mention that there is about a 100% chance when submitting this info
to an Eastern European post that the info ends up in the hands of the
Russian Mafia!

The only safe way to successfully meet and date foreign women is be
there and be social. In Kiev it's on the main street on Saturday nights when
it gets closed off and becomes like the 3rd St. Promenade in Santa Monica.
And these days you don't even need an interpreter as most women in Kiev
under the age of 40 speak English quite well.

John



This is correct that you need to be there to meet the good girls.
The letters got me there, but the ones that I met there have brought happiness to me!
My friends in Ukraine, expats and Ukrainian, all compliment me on the qualities of my Ladies!