Online Dating Rights. Mail Order Brides
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FOUR REASONS American men seek romance abroad: Prague, Ha Long Bay, Red Square, small villages in Latin America. Somehow meeting a Czech, Vietnamese, Russian or Peruvian/Colombian/Brazilian woman for a date at one of these exotic places is incomparably more exciting than meeting a hometown girl at the local coffeeshop. Opponents of a man's right to meet foreign women online never stop to consider how enjoyable it is to travel/work/live abroad and learn new cultures and languages while seeking a marriage partner.
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Author Topic: Anthropology study supports international relationships  (Read 28983 times)
tristan
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« on: July 01, 2007, 10:50:51 AM »

A professor of anthropology at the University of Pittsburgh, Nicole Constable, has published the results of her exhaustive two-year study of international relationships.

Professor Constable interviewed hundreds of American men, Filipina women and Chinese women, American and foreign NGOs, American and foreign women's rights groups, government officials and last but certainly not least she interviewed the owners of many international dating companies.

The results are contained in a book available on Amazon.com entitled "Romance on a Global Stage".  It was published in 2003.  Everyone interested in this subject should buy and read this book.

This is exactly the kind of scholarship needed by society for this issue.  In December 2005 the United States Congress passed an unconstitutional and man-hating law called IMBRA based on phony research prepared by women's advocacy groups.  The law was passed in the dead of night with no committee hearings and absolutely no scientific research.

Now, we have discovered that top-quality and exhaustive academic research has been done by a university professor and published for all the world to see in 2003.  And yet Congress did not see it, and no women's group that pushed IMBRA was willing to tell Congress about it.

NOW and Tahirih Justice Center and all the other women's groups that care so much about women completely ignored telling anyone about this detailed study that sheds light on...women.  Or, maybe they didn't know about it?  Well, they're going to know now.  I'm going to tell them.  I'm going to send a letter to NOW, Tahirih, the Center for Women's Policy Studies (they are the group that helps state legislators enact state IMBRA legislation) and everyone else I can think of who needs to know about this book.

Professor Constable is an academic.  She is not a politician.  She is not a leader of a women's advocacy group (although she is an avowed feminist and at times even considers herself a radical feminist).  She has devoted her life to anthropological research and teaching.  Websters says anthropology is: the study of man, esp. the study of man in relation to distribution, origin, classification and relationship of races, physical character, environmental and social relations, and culture.

Prof. Constable's work vindicates the existence of this website and the attitude of the men and women who support it.  It repudiates IMBRA and the kneejerk feminists who advocated it.  Here are some quotes from the book:
 
"Men and their perspectives, I learned, are - like the women - often misunderstood or glossed in stark and stereotypical terms."
 
"I have come to see the men involved in correspondence relationships as a very diverse group of people; many are decent and well-intentioned human beings who have learned a great deal in the process of their relationships."
 
"Many went to great lengths to ensure their partner's comfort and happiness in the United States."
 
"Troubling to some critics is that many women who opt to marry US men express a preference to remain at home and not to work if there is no financial incentive to do so, and a willingness to define themselves primarily as wives and mothers."
 
"Mail order brides are often depicted as buying into images of their own subservience and marrying out of economic depression.  These views are seriously flawed for their orientalist, essentializing and universalizing tendencies, which reflect many now-outdated feminist views of the 1970s."
 
"Anti-trafficking NGOs often include mail order brides among the ranks of trafficked women.  Definitions of mail order brides, as discussed below, are often so broad as to be meaningless." 
 
"Women may quite literally put their best face forward, but the market metaphor [that women are being sold] should not be taken literally in this context.  Would this metaphor be applied to western women and men who use dating services or place personal ads, or does it reflect more pejorative assumptions about foreign or Third World women?"
 
"Assuming that Asian women are objects who are bought and sold...is not only a bad feminist argument, but it is one that fits with the most demeaning and essentializing images of mail order brides.  Such images rob women of their ability to express intelligence, resistance, creativity, independence, dignity and strength."
 
"Overall I argue that women involved in correspondence relationships are not merely pawns of global political economy or the victims of sexual exploitation, nor are men simply the agents of western sexual imperialism."


http://www.ucpress.edu/books/pages/9922.html

http://www.pitt.edu/~pittanth/faculty/constable.html




« Last Edit: July 09, 2007, 10:42:45 AM by tristan » Logged

Advocacy groups that get taxpayer money for "protecting" foreign women and the thoughtless media call foreign woman a "mail order bride" if she met her husband via internet.  This is American imperialism, it is denigrating, insulting and portrays the women as helpless fools.
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« Reply #1 on: July 01, 2007, 11:59:34 AM »

"Troubling to some critics is that many women who opt to marry US men express a preference to remain at home and not to work if there is no financial incentive to do so, and a willingness to define themselves primarily as wives and mothers."

Critics include Gloria Steinem, Eleanor Smeal, Laylie Miller Muro, Jeanne Smoot, Leslie Bennetts, Linda Hirshman, and all public tax supported university women's studies departments.  It seems these folks are concerned about how other women primarily define themselves.

Of course, their captive audience was first limited to American women. Then the goal incuded bringing American men around to their paradigm.  Despite these efforts, many American women continue to define themselves as wives and mothers, primarily or otherwise.

As it is, these poor critics are fighting an uphill battle.

Now, throw in some foreign women and you have an all out declared war against those who would willingly perpetuate the patriarchy. 
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Olga
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« Reply #2 on: July 01, 2007, 02:36:14 PM »

The article from Russian newspaper pravda.ru
http://english.pravda.ru/society/family/29-04-2003/2688-family-0

American men use Russian women for self-affirmation. The latter seem to be liking this fact

Marriages between Russian women and American men are very successful and harmonious, Olga Makhovskaya, the senior research assistant at the Psychology Institute in Russia's Academy of Sciences says. When an American man switches from the model of American family where husband and wife are partners equal in rights to the model of an Orthodox family, he thus raises his own significance. In Orthodox families men are given more authority and are more respected. It is certainly an advantage for a man and raises his social and psychological status. In a word, American men seem to have tired of the feminism propagated by American women, and it is frequent that they seek Russian women to start families.

Russian wives in America give up the traditional model of the Russian Orthodox family which relieves them of a heavy burden of responsibility and gives a chance to have a normal life in a family where the range of responsibilities is more definite for them: children, family affairs and housekeeping. At that, Russian women enjoy more attention and support from husbands.

As psychologists say, now Russian men undervalue the essence of family. The whole of the burden, housekeeping, upbringing of children, earning of money are shifted onto women. And, at the time when Russian women have so much responsibilities, their husbands spend their time dozing in front of TV sets in desperate attempts to find out the meaning of life and to understand the truth of the universe. They merely disregard everyday problems that are essential for their families as they consider the above mentioned idle thinking to be of higher importance. 

That is why, as Olga Makhovskaya (a well-known psychologist and expert on families and emigration at the Institute of Psychology in Moscow) thinks relations in families between Russian and American partners are more harmonious. Each party gets what it wants to have. Husbands get authority and status, and wives are given, in exchange, peace in family and well-being. "Families of this kind where husbands are Americans and women are Russians prove to be long-living, as the roles in the family are clearly distributed and the mechanism operates good, although these are mixed families. In such families each of the couple is ready to make concessions and on the whole, wonderfully performs the role." 

In addition, as researches held by Olga Makhovskaya reveal, marriages between Chinese men and Russian women are also very successful. “There are tens of thousands of such marriages in Russia's Primorye region in the Far East. Chinese men are hard-working, they don't abuse in alcohol drinking and bring their wages home. In a word, they have lots of advantages by contrast with Russian men." It is sad, but the researches don't mention for whom Russian men suit wonderfully.
______________________________________________________________________

Traditional woman always will love and respect her husband who can provide peace in the family and well-being, and I really don't see anything wrong when a man takes the role of a head of family and lets his wife be a beautiful loving Woman - high priestess and keeper of family health and happiness. Can be an abuse in such family? My answer is not.  Smiley Can many men and women be devoid of finding their family happiness? Yes. Because of a law that is written by some people who don't care about it and probably do not know what the real family happiness is.
« Last Edit: July 01, 2007, 03:31:49 PM by Olga » Logged

frank johnson
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« Reply #3 on: July 01, 2007, 05:00:46 PM »

Thanks for the input Olga.

"Marriages between Russian women and American men are very successful and harmonious,"

"This is why they MUST be stopped!" says Layli Miller-Muro "I'm on my 2nd or 3rd un-sucessful and un-harmonious marriage now and I'm jealous so they must end."

Olga said "I really don't see anything wrong when a man takes the role of a head of family and lets his wife be a beautiful loving Woman - high priestess and keeper of family health and happiness."

"Well I do!" says Layli "Therefore you WILL obey IMBRA. I really don't see anything wrong when a high priestess Bahai woman takes the role of a head of family and makes her husband be an Iranian feminist slave."
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